Not Sure What You’re Feeling? How to Feel Your Feelings in Somatic Therapy, One Step at a Time
Have you ever been told to “just feel your feelings,” but you weren’t sure what that even means?
You’re not alone.
Many people struggle to understand what they feel or how to feel their emotions. It can be confusing, scary, or even uncomfortable. Maybe you were taught to hide your feelings or to stay strong no matter what. But pushing emotions away doesn’t make them disappear. Instead, they often show up in other ways—like stress, anxiety, tension, or feeling stuck.
The good news? There’s a gentle and powerful way to learn how to feel your feelings: somatic therapy.
In this blog, we’ll walk you through what somatic therapy is, why it helps, and how you can start feeling your feelings—one step at a time.
What Is Somatic Therapy?
Somatic therapy is a type of therapy that focuses on the body. The word “somatic” comes from the Greek word “soma,” which means “body.” This kind of therapy helps you connect your emotions to your body sensations.
In simple words: somatic therapy in Michigan helps you notice what your body is telling you.
Why is this important? Because feelings aren’t just in your head—they live in your body, too.
Think about how you know you’re nervous. Do your hands get sweaty? Does your stomach twist up? That’s your body showing you your feelings.
Somatic therapy teaches you how to listen to those signs and respond with care.
Why Don’t I Know What I’m Feeling?
There are many reasons why someone might not know what they’re feeling:
You were told not to cry or show emotion growing up
You’ve been through trauma and learned to “numb out”
You’ve had to focus on survival instead of emotions
You were never taught the names of different feelings
You tend to stay in your head and avoid your body
All of these reasons make a lot of sense. In fact, ignoring or pushing down emotions is often a way people try to protect themselves.
But over time, this disconnection can cause pain. You might feel overwhelmed, anxious, or even empty. You might struggle to make decisions, speak up for yourself, or form close relationships. That’s where somatic therapy can help.
Step 1: Slow Down
The first step to feeling your feelings is slowing down.
This might sound simple, but it’s one of the hardest things for people to do—especially if you’re used to being busy or distracted. When you slow down, you give yourself time and space to notice what’s really going on inside.
Here’s how to begin:
Turn off distractions like your phone or TV
Sit or lie down somewhere comfortable
Take a few slow, deep breaths
Notice what’s happening in your body
You might ask yourself:
Is my chest tight?
Are my shoulders tense?
Is my jaw clenched?
Do I feel heavy or numb?
Just notice. You don’t have to change anything.
Step 2: Get Curious, Not Critical
The next step is to get curious about what you're feeling. This means asking gentle questions without judging yourself.
For example, instead of thinking:
“What’s wrong with me? Why do I always feel this way?”
Try asking:
“What might this feeling be trying to tell me?” “When did I first start feeling like this?” “If this tightness had a voice, what would it say?”
These kinds of questions help you understand your body and emotions better.
Remember, emotions aren’t good or bad—they’re just signals. Feeling sad, angry, or scared doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re human.
Step 3: Name the Feeling
Once you’ve slowed down and gotten curious, you can try to name what you’re feeling.
Naming a feeling helps you organize your experience. It gives your brain and body a way to work together. Research shows that naming emotions can actually help calm the nervous system.
Here’s a short list to help you get started:
Happy
Sad
Angry
Afraid
Lonely
Guilty
Embarrassed
Confused
Hopeful
Tired
You don’t have to get it “right.” Sometimes it takes time to find the right word. You might say, “It feels like a mix of sad and tired,” or “I feel kind of empty.”
That’s okay. You’re learning a new language—the language of your feelings.
Step 4: Stay With the Sensation
Once you’ve named the feeling, see if you can stay with it for a little while.
This might feel uncomfortable, especially if you’re not used to it. But remember, emotions are temporary. They rise and fall like waves. They usually pass in about 90 seconds if you don’t fight or avoid them.
Try this:
Find where you feel the emotion in your body
Put your hand there if it helps
Breathe into that spot
Imagine sending it kindness or support
You can say to yourself:
“It’s okay to feel this.” “This feeling is allowed to be here.” “I’m safe right now.”
Staying with a feeling helps your body know it’s safe to feel again. Over time, this builds trust between your body and your mind.
Step 5: Let the Feeling Move
Emotions are energy. When you allow yourself to feel them, they often want to move.
This might look like:
Crying
Yawning
Shaking
Stretching
Taking deep breaths
Making sound
Moving your body gently
Somatic therapists call this discharge—your body’s natural way of releasing stress or stored emotions.
You don’t have to force anything. But if you feel the urge to move, let yourself follow it. Trust your body. It knows how to let go when it feels safe.
Step 6: Reflect and Rest
After you’ve felt and moved through an emotion, take time to reflect and rest.
You might journal about what you noticed, or simply sit in silence for a few minutes. You can ask:
What did I learn about myself?
What helped me feel safe?
What do I need now?
Maybe you need a nap, a glass of water, or to talk to a friend. Maybe you need to do nothing at all.
Feeling your feelings can be hard work. Your nervous system might feel tired after releasing built-up tension. That’s normal. Rest is part of healing.
Common Questions About Feeling Feelings
Q: What if I don’t feel anything at all?
A: That’s okay. In fact, not feeling anything is a feeling—we often call it numbness. Many people experience numbness, especially if they’ve been through stress or trauma. It’s your body’s way of protecting you from emotional overload.
You might not feel emotions right away, but that doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. Think of numbness like your body pressing the “pause” button. It’s saying, “Let’s take this slow.”
Instead of trying to force a feeling, start with what you can notice:
Are your feet touching the floor?
Is your chest rising and falling as you breathe?
Can you feel your hands on your lap?
These small body sensations are clues. They help you reconnect with yourself little by little. Over time, with patience and practice, your emotional awareness will grow. It’s like learning to listen to a quiet voice—it gets easier the more you try.
Q: What if I feel too much and get overwhelmed?
A: Feeling overwhelmed is also very normal—especially when you're not used to paying attention to your emotions. Sometimes, when we finally slow down and check in, it feels like a wave of feelings crashes all at once.
The key here is to stay grounded and go at your own pace.
Here are a few grounding exercises you can try:
5-4-3-2-1 Technique: Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste.
Feel your feet: Press them into the floor and notice how they support you. Wiggle your toes.
Breathe slowly: Inhale for a count of 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, and pause for 4. Repeat a few times.
Remember: You can pause anytime. You don’t have to feel it all at once. It's okay to take breaks, distract yourself with something calming (like a warm drink or a soft blanket), and come back to the feeling when you’re ready.
Think of your emotions like visitors—they come and go. You don’t have to invite them all in at once. You’re allowed to open the door slowly.
Q: Do I have to do this alone?
A: Definitely not. In fact, having support makes a big difference—especially if you’re dealing with big emotions or past trauma.
A somatic therapist is trained to help you move through these steps safely. They’ll guide you in noticing your body’s signals, staying grounded, and gently exploring your feelings without pressure.
You don’t have to explain everything with words. Sometimes, just noticing what’s happening in your body and sharing it with a therapist is enough to begin healing.
With support, it becomes easier to:
Trust your emotions
Stay present when things feel hard
Release old tension or stuck energy
Learn tools to regulate your nervous system
You’re not weak for needing help. You’re human. And humans are wired for connection. Healing doesn’t have to happen alone—it’s okay to reach out.
How Somatic Therapy Helps You Feel Your Feelings
Somatic therapy gives you tools to understand your emotions in a body-based way. Here’s how it helps:
You learn to feel safe in your body
You get better at naming and understanding emotions
You release old tension or trauma
You feel more connected to yourself and others
You learn to trust your body’s wisdom
Many people find somatic therapy life-changing. It’s especially helpful for those who have tried talk therapy but still feel stuck. Because it works with the body, it can reach parts of your experience that words can’t always touch.
Final Thoughts: Feeling Is Healing
If you’re not sure what you’re feeling, that’s okay. You’re not broken. You’re learning. And learning takes time.
Feeling your feelings is a skill. Somatic therapy in Michigan can help you build that skill step by step. You don’t have to rush, and you don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be willing to try.
Each time you slow down, notice a sensation, or stay present with an emotion, you’re healing. You’re reconnecting with your body. You’re coming home to yourself.
And that is something to celebrate.
Learning to Feel Doesn’t Have to Be Overwhelming—Try Somatic Therapy in Michigan
If naming your feelings or staying present with your emotions feels hard, you’re not alone. At Embodied Wellness, PLLC, we offer somatic therapy in Michigan to help you slow down, listen to your body, and reconnect with what you’re really feeling—one gentle step at a time. Whether you're feeling stuck, emotionally numb, or unsure where to begin, this work isn’t about pushing through, it’s about learning to be with yourself in a new way. Somatic therapy offers compassionate tools to help you feel more grounded, more present, and more connected to your inner world.
Our approach is trauma-informed, body-based, and rooted in safety. You don’t have to explain everything perfectly or process it all at once, we’ll meet you right where you are. Somatic therapy isn’t about fixing you. It’s about guiding you back to yourself, with curiosity, care, and support. You deserve healing that honors your pace and your story. Take the next step toward healing today:
Be matched with one of our somatic therapists in Michigan
Start reconnecting with your emotions—your body already knows how to begin
Additional Online Therapy Services in Michigan
At Embodied Wellness, PLLC, we offer a variety of holistic treatment services—including somatic therapy—that support adults and teens navigating anxiety, depression, trauma, and OCD. We specialize in EMDR, Somatic Experiencing, Internal Family Systems, and DBT for trauma, all of which help clients feel safer and more connected in their bodies. We also provide CBT, ERP, and empath counseling. We offer online therapy in Michigan. Start your healing journey today through somatic therapy at our Detroit-based practice. We also have low-cost therapy options available!
About the Author:
Sarah Rollins, LMSW, SEP, is the founder of Embodied Wellness, PLLC—a group therapy practice offering compassionate, trauma-informed care, including somatic therapy in Michigan for adults and teens. With a background in Somatic Experiencing, EMDR, and Internal Family Systems (IFS), Sarah helps clients gently reconnect with their emotions, their bodies, and themselves. Her team specializes in supporting people who feel overwhelmed, shut down, or unsure how to name what they’re feeling—especially those navigating trauma, anxiety, or emotional disconnection. At Embodied Wellness, the focus isn’t on fixing what’s “wrong,” but on offering a safe, grounded space where healing can unfold one step—and one feeling—at a time.